Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
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