I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
