I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
