what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
