We won't sleep together?
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Randomize
