I only kidnapped one of them. chill
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
