Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
i think i have two assholes
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
so let's talk penis.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Randomize
