Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
Randomize
