Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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