so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
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