ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Randomize
