We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize
