I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
We have started to decorate penises.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize
