He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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