i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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