my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Randomize
