Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
