Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
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