He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize
