So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
