I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Randomize
