brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
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