I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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