i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
