My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
