we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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