super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I yelled at your uterus for you.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
