So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
