we made out on top of his cat.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
