your parents love me but you hate me
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Randomize
