i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
