I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
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