Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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