ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
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