It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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