Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
