lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Randomize
