Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Randomize
