i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
he shaved USA in his pubs
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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