The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
She said her name was "party"
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Randomize
