Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
she pinky promised me she was 18
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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