yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize