You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
Randomize