I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Randomize
