Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
