normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Randomize
