hotel room ftw
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize
