yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
