in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Randomize
