tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Randomize
